mo.

Hi Aubry and her peeps.

When Jen asked if I had a day that I preferred to write, I chose Halloween with the intention of telling everyone how awesome Aubry’s costume was this year, how she won the chili contest yet again this year and how she made the best Halloween treats for our office potluck; because, as you all are aware, pretty much anything Aubry attempts, she aces and causes everyone to stop and awe. Pretty much an easy bet that will be the case today. Jen granted my wish to write on Halloween and then asked that I turn in my submission the day before. Fail! So much for a ready-made, easy-peasy submission. She will have to blog about that another day.

Aubry and I have been co-workers for over six years now. She’s been there for me as I went through a painful divorce and has both clapped with delight and listened in horror as I’ve revealed my latest dating stories. She’s admonished me to share these funny and horrifying stories with the world either in a book or a blog. I’m afraid that I’ve disappointed her by not complying. There is a good amount I could tell:

1. About the guy with the awful name (Aubry warned me about dating a guy with that name.
I should have listened.) that after getting serious and starting to make wedding plans, I
discovered that I was one of many, and that he had been together for almost two years with
his “real” gf and almost fiancé.

2. About the guy who I thought was a nice upstanding LDS guy, after several dates I discovered
that he had been married at least five times. He didn’t know the number off the top of his head and had to name them one by one to determine how many times he had actually been married.
Not only that, but one of his marriages was polyandrous (his wife had more than one husband).
I found this out not after a few dates, but after several, when he mentioned that he was going
out of town to get a divorce from his then, current wife. I had made the mistake of assuming
that the man was single.

3. About the newly single widower who was quite a bit older than me but wanted to practice
dating with me. I took this guy and picked a new dating wardrobe, down to new, not old man,
eyeglass frames. I know everyone in the office was afraid I was going to fall for this father of
12 who sent flowers weekly, bought me gifts, wrote beautiful sentiments on cards that had
pictures of kittens wearing crowns, took me to visit the grave of his dead wife and asked me
to mentor his 16 year old daughter who desperately needed a mother figure in her life. The
hardest part of that relationship was when he asked if I could teach him how to kiss. I reluctantly
agreed to see what he had to offer. The 57 year old man kissed like a 12 year old! I was blunt
with the guy. “I feel sorry for your dead wife,” I told him.

4. About the guy who, on every date, brought me presents. Not fun presents that I wanted, but
mostly garish jewelry that I can’t even get anyone to wear for Halloween.

All of those and many more dating experiences weren’t in vain. I’ve met a wonderful man that I now
call my husband. Aubry was there to save me from sending out less than wonderful announcements
and at the 11th hour re-created the whole thing in a flash. She’s the one that I call when I’m at the store because I’m supposed to make a spice cake and they don’t have any. “What can I do?” She of course has the answer. She’s the one who has provided me many party planning ideas and tells me when I’m wearing an “outfit” and also lets me know that it’s not always a bad thing so I don’t feel like a fashion misfit.

We are both November babies and have, on occasion, celebrated our birthdays together while at work.

Happy birthday to us!

Love, Mo.