adulthood.

in my never-ending, curious quest to conquer adulthood, i ran across an article in real simple magazine called "beauty in motion" by andrea avery - a high school english teacher from paradise valley, az.

her adult moment came when she shed the fear of self-consciousness about her looks {and internal awkwardness from a life with rheumatoid arthritis} and remained joyful while "dress[ing] like a weirdo... embracing her 'fashion adventurous' style... putting together look-at-me outfits that were equal parts laura ingalls wilder, stevie nicks, and wonder woman" and "[commanding] her reliable and solid body, a thing to be danced and decorated."

it took her 30 years to realize this. to realize that people aren't looking at her as much as she had feared - or, if they were, she secretly didn't mind it.

hallelujah for me... i conquered this one a long time ago. maybe that contributes to my "intimidation" factor. maybe it's not so much intimidation as it is equal parts self-confidence and unapologetic behavior. if you're going to be someone, own it. and love it. and be the best at it.

i guess that means i'm an adult. at last.