three reasons i love my job

1.  i'm reading the novel "the tales of despereaux" to my class.  we're only like 7 chapters in and they are HOOKED.  they love it.  when i asked for opinions of the book after only having read 4 chapters, one boys' response was:

"ms.  i really like the book a lot.  when you are reading, there is so much descriptions that it's like a moving playing in my head" he says as he closes his eyes and touches his forehead. 

AH-DOR-ABLE!

2.  a conversation between myself and a rather large boy in my class:

S:  ms.  i have very bad news.  i have to tell you but you can't tell anyone ok?

ME (worried):  ok s.  what's wrong?

S:  well ms., *whispering* i think i'm being stalked!

ME (trying not to laugh):  oh really?!  what makes you think that?

S:  well ms., there is someone who keeps following me.  and she isn't very cute.  and everywhere i go ms., if i look behind me, she is there!

ME (trying REALLY hard not to laugh): oh dear!  well, i'm sure that it's just a coincidence. 

S:  no ms.!  it isn't!  and do you want to know the worst part ms.?  *whispers* it's a girl!

ME:  *hysterical cackle out loud*

S:  ms. it isn't funny!  what should i do ms.?

ME:  you know s, in a few years you aren't going to think that this was quite so bad!  i want you to test your theory tomorrow and keep me posted ok?  

S:  ok ms.

ME:  plus s, she's probably cute!!  *more cackling*

3.  sitting at my desk, well after the kids should be gone home, a young girl comes in my class.  

H:  ah, hi ms.  

ME:  hi h.

H:  ah, ms., do you want to hear the poem that i made up at recess about the boys?

ME:  yes, please!

H:  ah, ok ms.  "go east, go west, you snore like a pig!"  oh.  i guess that doesn't really rhyme does it?

ME:  well not quite.  let's try this, "go west, go east, you snore like a beast!"  

H:  *laughing* ok, bye ms. 

this is a conversation that i had with one of my students this week:

S:  ms. you know i am going to russia this weekend. 
me:  that's what you told me.  but really, russia just for the weekend??"
S:  yes, ms.  of course. 
me:  ok, well i hope you have a great weekend in russia!
S:  you know ms, i am going to buy you a nice present in russia. 
me:  oh no, you really don't have to buy me anything in russia!  really!
S:  ms.  i will buy you a present and you're just going to love it.  *pause*  oh i just can't hold it in anymore!  i'm going to buy you a russian jacket ms.!

he was SO excited about this russian jacket!  i'm not even sure what he means!  but i reassured him that i have many jackets and he really doesn't need to buy me anything in russia! 

maybe i should go to russia for a weekend?! :)

kids are aweomse

A:  ms. emily, i need to tell you, i hate school.

me:  no you don't hate school!!

A:  yes ms!  i do!  i really do hate it!

me:  oh!  so what you're trying to say is that you love me??

A:  yes ms!  i like you.  but i don't like school ms!

at least i'm not the reason!!  let's see what this week will bring!! cross your fingers for two wonderful grade 5 classes that have miraculously learned to raise their hands and stop chatting over the weekend!!

canadian lingo??

emily (while discussing losing my passport):  so then i had to drive 500 kilometers to get a new passport!  it was such a gong show!!
american teacher 1:  you must be canadian?!
emily:  yes....how do you know??
a.t.:  you just said "kilometer" and "gong show" in one sentence.

*thought* who knew that americans don't use the term gong show?!?!?!

emily (to another group of teachers):  hey guys, did you know that americans don't know the term gong show?!?
american teacher 2:  i was going to ask you what you meant by that.
canadian teacher 1:  i knew what you meant....
canadian teacher 2:  so weird....

*thought* must say gong show more often so that EVERYONE starts saying gong show!

details, PLEASE!

tonight cindy and colleen came over for dinner.  here are some of the conversations that we had:

while watching the oscars...

COLLEEN:  that movie was so good!  and it had guy in it!

CINDY: YA! it did!  

telling us about a good movie...

KELLY:  the one with the train.  and the guy.  who was black.  it was really good!

discussing justin timberlake in movies...

CINDY:  justin timberlake was in shrek?!

COLLEEN:  ya!  remember, he was the guy.  that was animated.  and little.

while watching the oscars...again...

KELLY:  what's that movie with the costumes??  with the stripes that go up and down?

CINDY: OH!  that's...something TRON.  

and then there was this one...

COLLEEN:  cindy tried to put her foot into the feta cheese.  but i told to her to stop.

EMILY:  maybe she has a FOOT FETA!!  

HAHAHAHAA!!!!  yup, still funny!

the 5 second rule.

or is it 3 second rule?  or 10 second rule?  

or if it touches the ground it's off limits rule?

we've been debating this one a lot around here lately.  is there a rule at all?  and does it depend on what country you're in?  or what location you're in?  or if it lands on the table?  or on the floor?

kelly says:  

"if it's not on your plate or your fork, it's garbage!"

cindy says:

"ya what he said!"

sean says:

"isn't the table just a bigger version of a plate?"

emily says:

"if the dirt isn't visible, it can't be THAT bad!"

what are your thoughts on this one?  do share!

what did one goose say to the other goose???

we were riding the motorbike to work on friday morning, as usual, and there on the side of the road were these two geese.  they are always there.  in the same spot.  awaiting their fate.  but on this particular morning, something was different.  they are the type of goose that is all white with orange feet and beaks but on friday, they had clearly been playing in the mud.  they were both really dirty but one of the geese had wet brown mud all over his beak.  immediately the following conversation popped in my head:

GOOSE 1:  ahhhh...do i have something on my face??

GOOSE 2:  no way bro!  you're good.  

GOOSE 1: oh ok good!  thanks man!

then i laughed out loud.  and told kelly.  he didn't think it was funny.  he thought i was weird.  

then the following conversation popped in my head:

GOOSE 2:  dude, you have mud ALL over your face!

GOOSE 1:  really?!?  where??  *wipes his beak with his wing* did i get it???

GOOSE 2: *rolls his eyes* ya you got it alright...*walks away from goose 1*

then i laughed out loud.  and told kelly.  he didn't think this was funny either!  he thought i was REALLY weird.

i proceeded to laugh to myself all day, every time i thought about the geese.  in fact, i still think its funny.  cause ducks must talk to each other right?!  i wonder what those two will be up to tomorrow morning....???

hmmm...what's that supposed to mean?!

tonight kelly and i were talking.  i don't even know how it all started but then, after a few minutes....

KELLY:  how have you put up with me for FOUR years?  you usually get sick of people after like 6 months!

EM:  hmmm....well i guess that means you passed the test!

what does this say about me??  i don't think it's true.  there are lots of people that i like after more than 6 months!  right??  RIGHT??  

oh dear....

the magic rat

this morning after swimming one of my kids came RUNNING up to me...

J:  ms. emily, ms. emily *with eyes WIDE* this morning as i was waiting for the bus, a rat came out on the street and then this motorbike came by and BOOM! it hit the rat!

MS. E: ew!  that's sick!

J:  but the rat didn't die!  and then, another motorbike came by and BOOM!  it hit the rat!  and the rat STILL didn't die!  

MS. E:  *laughing* well maybe it was a magic rat?!  and that's still gross!

didja - what now?

**note:  if you have been reading lindsay's blog, you've already heard this story.  but it's on my "to blog" list and i feel the need to share this story even though linds beat me to it!

after visiting the GEEEMMMMM store earlier that day, we were sitting around having a drink when phil started making comparisons...

PHIL:  so, you were worried about buying your ring at the GEEEMMMMM shop, but you spent how much on that digi-doo-hicki thing in australia???

EMILY:  it's called a DIDGERIDOO!

PHIL:  ya, well you should have DIDGERI-DON'T!

EMILY:  too bad!  i DIDGERI-DID!

awesome.  :)

sri lanks...

 throughout our time in sri lanka, we had a favourite saying...

i think that phillip was the one who came up with it but it went like this..."sri lanks...YES thanks!"

and it was appropriate in SO many situations!  and when it wasn't, we went with an altered version..."sri lanks...NO thanks!"

the most appropriate use of the saying (besides the time that it helped phil and i win a game of catch phrase) was on our last night.  this is how the conversation went as we tried to convince the parkinson's to either stay in SL or come with us to vietnam:

PHILLIP:  "sri lanks....YES thanks!"

EM:  Q8, you can WAIT!

EM: *after a few seconds* Vietnam, you're the BOMB!

EVERYONE: *rolling their eyes*....*silence*

i guess that didn't work out how i planned in my head!

best joke ever

ok so as i sort out my thoughts about my trip to sri lanka, i leave you with this joke.  thanks so lindsay for the best joke of the trip!

LINDS:  what's long, green, and has wheels?

US:  uh, i don't know...what??

LINDS:  grass.  i was lying about the wheels!

HAHAHAHAHA!!  awesome!!  i love this girl!

laugh of the day

i was talking to my mom on the phone tonight. we were talking about how kelly and i are no longer at the same campus at school so i don't get to ride on the motor bike anymore.

Emily: "and i was going to start riding kelly's pedal bike but his helmet is too small for my big head."

Mom: "what do you mean it's too small? is it some kind of little vietnamese helmet?"

E: "I don't know but kelly's head seems to be smaller now cause he's always running and has lost so much weight."

M: "Well there you go! Loose some weight and your head will shrink!"

*insert FITS of laughter and tears from laughing so hard*

M: "or you could cut the other side of your hair off and that might help."

*insert more laughter*

oh my momma. she's so funny! guess i better get moving so my head will fit into that helmet!

rain, rain, go away!

my class really is fantastic. i've been thinking more and more lately, just how lucky i am. and i really have nothing to complain about that's for sure!! people often come into my class and are so impressed with how well they are working and with what they have accomplished this year. other teachers come in and comment on how quietly they work or how independent they are and sometimes i wonder what the heck they see that i don't see. but if i take a moment and look at the big picture, it's true. they are amazing. and i guess it's because of my high expectations of them that i don't see it as often as i should, but my kids rock!

so that brings me to today's story. well actually it happened yesterday. we have swimming on friday at 1:35 so we are ready to go around 1:25. they had their swimsuits on, towels over their shoulders, goggles in hand by about 1:22. at approximately 1:23 it started to POUR! like we are talking full-fledged, rainy season is BACK, pouring cats and dogs, RAIN. this is of course followed by thunder and lightning. so i had to make the "bad guy decision". sorry boys and girls, no swimming today!

but it's been such a long time since it rained here and they were all so interested in the rain so i took them outside under the shelter of the covered sidewalk and we watched the rain. at first it was raining really hard and they were squealing with delight. then there was a huge crack of thunder and few of the timid ones took a step closer to the building. some were building up their courage to step up and stick their hands out into the refreshing rain. and i had an urge. i really, really wanted to take them out to play in the rain. imagine how fun it would have been to take 16 five year olds out into the POURING rain in their bathing suits!! however, my logical side kicked in to remind me that the parents here would NOT love that. they are big on the "change in weather causes colds". i am more on the "germs cause colds" belief but who am i to say?! anyway, i was sad that we couldn't play but there wasn't much i could do.

i was just about to take them inside when they had a moment. a "man i love these kids" moment. they all started singing together, "rain, rain, go away, come again another day!". over and over. and they were so happy and hopeful that their chanting would make the sun come out so that they could go swimming. it just reminded me how cool they are and even though it didn't work, and it kept raining, they gave it a shot!

as we went back inside and i had them change back into their uniforms, one boy asked me, "ms. emily, is it raining because the sky is crying?" "yes, it is!" i replied. how could i say no to that?