love sponsor.

a title coined by robin, circa 2000-2001.

it's just like an alcoholic's anonymous sponsor... when an alcoholic feels a moment of weakness coming on, they call their sponsor.

when a girl feels a moment of weakness coming on... when she feels herself falling for a boy her friends don't approve of, she calls her love sponsor.

image via ffffound.

robin and jen are my current love sponsors - yeah, i need two - and i am currently serving as a love sponsor to a {dude} friend of mine.

example of love sponsorship duties:

{a} when a girl falls victim to the charm and good looks of a boy who will ultimately do more harm than good, it's her love sponsors responsibility to knock some sense into her. the entire sitch can be solved in a simple text message conversation. ex: "don't. get. suckered. in. he. is. no. good. for. you."

{b} boy receives a "flirty" text message from a girl he's reeeallly "just not that into" {who, out of sheer chivalry, he had previously accepted a few invitations for dates}. instead of an immediate reply, he forwards his love sponsor the text and she carefully craft a response on his behalf... or advises him not to respond to the text at all, giving the poor girl a opportunity to think about what a lame thing she's just done.

{c} when a girl "relapses", she's likely sad, crying, etc. - her love sponsor may step in and take measures into her own hands. it may or may not be solved in the form of an email. ex: "dear xxxx, don't ever talk to my friend aubry ever again. thank you, robin."

single people around the world need a sponsor. we need the wisdom of a third party... someone with a vested interest in our ultimate happiness. someone involved enough in the happenings of our lives, but objective enough to tell it like it is. love sponsors should be available around the clock, for immediate assistance is required during moments of weakness.

umm, do you think it's ironic that jen is sponsoring me to stay f-a-a-a-a-r away from the very boy i'm sponsoring? i've never been a obedient sponsoree, have i?